Here is one take on the way many of us lead our lives...........


1. Spend the most energetic and creative forty hours of your week doing a few limited tasks over and over again so that a pathological profit-oriented corporate-establishment can maintain itself a little better.

2. Cram the wild, ungovernable, truly creative and madly generous part of your psyche into evenings, weekends and a few weeks off, when you’re too knackered, uptight and rushed to meaningfully develop it; when you’d much rather blitz out or just buy some entertainment than create anything for yourself.

3. Talk about two and three, and all media reports of two and three, over and over again: ideally by complaining.

4. Use any other microns of free time to pursue sex, drugs, excessive CGI stimulation, money, power, crude feelings of tribal bonding and whatever momentary prestige tokens you can acquire within the constraints of the system.

5. Repeat until your death bed, when you suddenly realise that your whole life has been an utterly pointless sham and the pure experience of solitude that encroaching death brings on is utterly impossible to communicate meaningfully to any of your so-called friends and loved ones, who watch on helplessly (or even impatiently) as you the psuedo-life you have lived passes inexplicably into a moment of genuineness aliveness that nobody can understand.


However here are some ways that trannies maybe lead their lives

1. Start dressing in mum's, sister's or aunt's clothes from an early age...anywhere between about 5 and 10.

2. At puberty get confused whether you want to be a boy or a girl, and either dress up and feel guilty or try hard to suppress the desire of wanting to be a girl/woman and wear women's clothes. Admire yourself a lot in a mirror, when dressed...and feel guilty in case you get caught.

3. From twenties to about 40-45 join the forces/be a fireman, grow a beard, dress in secret....in that closet Narnia is near the back....... Have frequent purges of clothes and deny that you are a TV or cross dresser. Maybe even get married and have children - always denying that you are a Tgirl.

4. Around 40 - 50 become more adventurous and discover things like internet sites for trannies and support groups ( dependent on when you were this age it could be pre internet which was harder). Start to go out dressed as a woman - scary at first. Hope that wife or partner doesn't find out or pluck up the courage to tell her.

5. 40 onwards...more of the same, and maybe even finally realize your dream and transition (with or without surgery) and live full time, or continue as a part time kinda gal. On death bed hope that there is reincarnation and next time you come back as a woman.

I am sure that most of you have different things you wanted to do or failed to do,and the timing is different for all of us - whether you are a boy named Sue ...or Lola


Pauline xxxx

About sums it up Pauline, very humorous and true, I wonder how many of us are actually aware, or realise our dreams/goals before it's too late to achive them. Being an old bird who's already had a heart attack full transition medically is really out the window, thanks for the post xxx

Pauline,
you hit the nail on the head. I have never meet you, but you wrote my live story, at least up to my late 40's. This is way I love this site because there are others that share my same feelings and live events.
Love it.
xxxx

Nice writing Pauline! - inspired to jump on and tell my version of the tranny bits of my life till now if that’s OK!

1) Yep, i was about 5 when i first decided that the cute little navy dress (with a massive pink flower) on the front my 3 year old sister was wearing was much nicer than the drab - and yet looking back now stylish - Starsky and Hutch t shirt i was wearing so promptly put it on. This caused a slight but all too common problem that girls clothes which are too small for you can sometimes go on but are invariably a major problem to get off…..cue mini Jaqui going into the kitchen to tell a confused looking mother i was stuck!

2) Puberty - not sure on this one, i knew from the minute i put the dress (described in 1 above for those with short attention spanson that i wanted to be a girl not a boy and pretty much hit puberty accepting this. I probably started dressing properly in secret when i was 13 without ever really feeling guilty about it - although i definitely knew it was not on the normal spectrum of what i was aware of at the time so was fully in Narnia land!. Looking back now, if it existed the internet (damm you internet for not existing!) would have made me realise i wasn’t the oddest shaped tool in the shed and Jaqui might have been more permanent than she is - however erm whatever! I never think there’s any point thinking about what might have been:)

3) 20 - 30 was pretty much a mixture of attempting to climb faceless corps career ladders (Joy!), properly meeting real girls growing a variety of facial hair and head hair and (mainly) getting drunk! I was very lucky with my first long term relationship as the girl i was with had a fetish for blokes in makeup (although unfortunately only makeup) so she became the first person i came out to - and definitely because of the fetish thing! - she didn’t give a monkeys. After that had ended this (again very luckily) meant i made the decision to tell anyone i was getting involved with sooner rather than later so - although she unfortunately doesn't want to meet her (although as she’s actually me! she really already has if you get my drift!) my SO has been aware Jaqui exists from nearly the first time i met her.

4) 30 - 38 this is the only time in my life Jaqui physically (but not mentally) disappeared. It wasn’t for reasons of guilt (i’ve always quite liked and accepted the fact that im a tranny - it seems to me way more interesting than not being!) i just spent most of my 30’s trying to get off faceless corps career ladder by working in espana and Jaqui didn’t really suit a bikini- then getting back on it when there went for a bit more of a wobble than here….

5) 38 - now(39!) Jaqui came back, not sure what prompted it but pretty soon after my 38th i went on a restock Jaqui buying spree and well, here i am. I do think your description of discovering internet sites for trannies (especially this one) has something to do with the frequency Jaqui’s out since then - i turns out (although i already knew it really) im a complete narcissist when dolled upand having somewhere to post stuff rather than getting dressed and staring into the mirror is fun! plus the peeps here are proper nice:)

6) 39 onwards - who knows! this place has got me wanting to go out and about (on scene firstat some point soon so you’ve painted an accurate picture. Unless they invent some sort of magic sex change ray gun (hurry up internet!!) i'm way to lazy (which probably means not sufficiently unhappy with my lot!) to be anything other than a part time T Girl but meh im happy that way

Reading that back i suppose ive probably had this tranny malarky a lot easier than some, soz! Anyway that is a bit of me and christ ive waffled on a lot so ill shurrup (i blame Pauline its a good subject matter!)

Jaqs XX

lol hmmmm i do hope im not working lol xxxxx

seriously i want to make sure my family are happy and secure

and try and make a difference in this world for the better of mankind well that and try and make the world to see us trans as we are.
human and as fragile as the rest of humanity

i would say world peace but that is asking a lot lol xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Go for it Amy - I am after world revolution before I die - and I aim to get it - ideally while in a nice frock!!!! xxxxx

And I mean it - just ask Pauline!!

Great post Pauline by the way xxxx

lol im with you sister lets start the revolution but i need to go shopping first havent a thing to wear lol

xxxxxxx

We will find something along the way - sure to seize a few fashion outlets on the road to power!!!! xx

oh i like your style lol lets do it xxxxxxx

Ha Hi Marianne and Amy, I'm coming shopping too, coming up north in me estate car midweek, holds loads of shoping and got room for another 2 lol xxx

ha ha nice one jady count us in xxxxxxxx

Break out those camo shorts Amy, I know where there's a tank we can use.

I'm pretty sure you're allowed to park them right outside Gap and Next.

What do we want? Tranny Only Car Park Spaces, when do we want it? Just before closing when it's dark so nobody sees us going in!

Viva la Senza!

Debbie

As to the 5 things, yes, yes, no (definitely noooo), yes and not yet, I got off that train and joined the subway.

Debbie

lmao nice one debbie love it xxxxxxxx

I know there are no pockets in a shroud...but we could be cremated "en femme" in a closed coffin?

And as Marianne's revolution - more frocks and shoes for all.

In Germany all the car parks have "frauen platz" - on ground floor and near the entrance to the "parkhaus" or the shops. Debbie's idea is good - "tranny platz"...or just go in the women's places when out as T girl.

P xxx

I will amend my will forthwith, Pauline.

It'll be a shame to cremate one of my frocks, I was going to leave them all to charity. The Tranny Benevolence Fund. I'm sure the five pound they are worth will help a tranny in dire need.

Debbie

A credit card with no limits and Bluewater just for me and all my transtastic friends exclusively for a weeks solid shopping!

XXXXX Carol

I think you may be shrouding the issue lol xxxx

I would never look good in a shroud...white is not my colour. P xxx

5 things I want to do before I die:
1. live for as long as I can, erm that's all!
:)
This post was edited by Mal Ware at October 16, 2013 10:32 PM BST

Lol Pauline - even if it was diaphanous!! xx

mal you just rock dude fabulous answer xxxx

Especially if the shroud was diaphanous, then everyone would see my undies......