Touche

• Posted by Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL. B/acc March 23, 2018 Filed in Member's Blogs 4,546 views
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  It was a holiday, The sun was shining, the day was hot, It was a rare bank holiday indeed. Harry the electrician rolled over in bed, looked at the clock, it was 9am, first day off from work for over 6 months. He gazed at the vacant side of the bed and was mildly suprised, It was empty!,, he pondered for a moment remembering the last day off he had had. A morning of rampant sex with his GF, followed by a sumptuous breakfast, more rampant sex, Lunch in the garden a crate of lager followed by more rampant sex. Truly a memorable occasion which carried on in the same theme for the rest of that day. 
  
  Suddenly the bedroom door was thrown open, his GF stood there in the skimpiest of knickers, holding a breakfast tray, bucks fizz,eggs, bacon, sausage tomatoes, the full English. Pot of coffee toast and marmalade. Wow he thought to himself this is going to be another truly memorable day. His GF placed the tray down over his legs, leant forward and kissed him leading him to believe that this was going to be one hell of a day. She backed off, saying with a lavicous smile ''Eat your breakfast, your going to need your strength'' As he tucked in, she enquired as to his intentions for the day, Smirking he replied ''I'm at your disposal for the whole day Oh lovely one, use me as you will'' 
  
  ''Oh great, brilliant'' she says, adding ''You can put the new light fittings up in the bathroom, lounge and hallway'' It was like being hit by a truck, Harry lay there stunned at this vicious onslaught. He started recovering, reaching out to pull at her knickers, 
  ''No! don't even go there'' she says your not wasting another bank holiday, those lights have been hanging round since the last day you had off'' 
  
  Pushing the tray to one side, breakfast now forgotten, Harry says, ''Jesus Christ, its a bank holiday, do you realy think I am going to spend the first day off I have had in six months, doing something I am forced to do every day, to pay for your sexy underwear and not reap the benefeits'' 
  
  She says, ''AND'' Harry says, ''sod this, I'm off to the snooker hall, I'll have lunch with my mates down the pub'' 
  
  It was a balmy night as Harry staggered up to the front door, spending some considerable time trying to align his key with the lock that kept moving in the gentle evening breeze. Finally falling through the front door, fumbling for the light switch, suddenly, 
  the hallway was flooded with a new luminance that he had not seen before, gazing up, he noted the new light fittings. resplendant in their new envioroment. Suddendly the need to relieve himself of the beer he had poured down his neck during the last 10 hours, he headed for the bathroom, pulled the cord and was amazed at such brilliance he had not encountered there before. Contemplating his willy and trying to pee in the right place, he pondered this miracle. Yes you guessed the new light fittings had magically installed themselves. 
  
  Finally in a better frame of mind, he had lurid thoughts now of a night of drunken debauchery, innocently thinking that everything was now allright with the world. On opening the bedroom door, the first thing he saw was his lovely GF lay stark naked on the bed, dozing, a sweet happy smile on her face, as he gazed around he noticed the skimpy knickers and other feminine items of apparel strewn round the bedroom, then he noticed his GF was actually tied to the bed. WOW he thought to himself, this is great. 
  
  He gently kissed her lips, she moaned, he nuzzled her breast with his lips, he gently carressed her belly button with his tongue, then kissed her knees, at this moment she awoke, ''Saying if it had of been a pub you bastard you would'nt have gone past it'' recoiling in shock, Harry in a fuddled confused moment, to difuse the situation asked ''I see you put up the new lights'' she replied ''ME! put up the lights, what are you some bloody idiot, The woman next door, her bother came to fix her lights, so I asked him to pop round and do ours'' ''What says Harry, how much did that king cost?' She through clenched teeth and with a look that could melt concrete she said ''nothing, I gave him the choice, Rampant perverted, sex or a roast dinner'' 
  
  Harry said ''ooh good I am a bit peckish, what did you cook, any left over''? 
  
  
  
  She says ''COOK! BLOODY COOK! YOU DO NOT THINK I WAS GOING TO SPEND THE ONE DAY OFF I HAVE HAD IN OVER A YEAR DOING SOMETHING I DO EVERY BLOODY DAY, DO YOU''?