I am writing this in the hope that it may help someone like me.
I was born just after an air raid,a series of bombs. This dates me !! However,I did not know the effect on me till many years later. Growing up I did the things that lots of us do,trying on Sisters knickers and frocks.This gave me a sexual buzz,but I did not associate this with wanting to be a girl. I was one of the gang,wrestling and boy stuff was all.Iwas the ideas person,which means that I usually got the blame for everything that went wrong!
Physically,I had good skin,never bothered with spots,delicately shaped,fair hair ,blue eyes,a boys or girls dream ,in retrospect. I did suffer from soreness between the legs,put down to using a racing bike saddle on my paper round,I also at 13 showed the qccasional spotting of blood,and I used to have tremendous "hissy"fits. All of this was written off by parents/doctors as nothing to worry about. If only they had ignored the bombs and looked between my legs as they should have before giving me a "sex" I was also very small,especially in the cold.This meant hiding away in the changing rooms,and some teasing if seen.
i was not aware of being abused by anyone as child,and had the usual gropings of other children ,I think. Things started for me when I left home to start an apprenticeship. Part of this was sport.Iwas too small for rugby,but fast so I took up Cross County running,(although being fallen on by all those big sweaty bodies was a bit of a treat and a new thing for me!)and was good at it.A very solitary sport which took me into some remote countryside. Our standard run was along an old railway track,very overgrown.Passing a thicket I was stopped by two bigger boys who I knew,dragged in and stripped. They used me for about an hour, should say fucked me,although I do not want to be coarse,but thats what it was,Ithen made me run ,naked in front of them almost back to the school,when they allowed me to dress.The thought of my little twinkling bottom still turns me on!
In the bath house after this it was explained to me that I was their property,they would look after me,and I was to be available just for them.This was the first time that I had had sex,in any way at all andI had enjoyed it ,in a terrified way,and knew that I would get a severe beating if I said anything.This would ,I knew, also ruin my career,and of course then it was illegal.
They were to leave in 4 months,until then I was their virtual slave,discretly,evrery week,and there was nothing that I could do about it.I learned what they liked,they treated me as a girl and were kind and I found that I was actually in charge, and that was ,for a tiny like me a big kick.These were 18 year old men and THEY wanted me badly,so I would tease them to distraction. This activity took place in the bathroom,with me all pink and smelling of Camay,which was THE soap to have then,with one of them keeping watch ,waiting his turn.
T,he running continued,Me being forced to run naked in front of them for a mile or so.This ,I believe,did improve my running,as I dicovered that the one that caught me had me first,this was a big turn on,as one of them was really big and I enjoyed him most,but the other was a good kisser. I was quite the little flirt and knew that I was driving them wild. They did sometimes have me together,one kissing me ,the other fucking me,that drove me wild.I was also skewered from both ends ,which sounds like fun but actually takes a lot of practice to get right.A small table under the tummy helps a lot.
One day,one of them producd a gymslip,school knickers,socks,blouse sandals,that he had found discarded by his sister. They made me put this on in the bathroom,and as they were both naked,I saw the incredible effects that me wearing this had on them,they were so aroused that they were holding each other,a thing that they never did .I,bitch that I was,have never been so well and truly fucked, (I do not care for the ANGLOSAXON WORDS ,BUT THIS IS THE ONLY ONE THAT WORKS)I could barely walk and really did not know or care what sex I was when I was allowed up,I felt wonderful,loved,and truly I would have done anything for them.
Bear in mind that this was an ALL male society,I had no knowledge of girls whatsoever,just knew they were different and had been at a segregated school prior to this.Seeing girls in gym knickers was a real treat and now I was wearing them !!! Naturally,I now knew that I was in definatly charge,and they now made love to me on my terms,which were ,in retrospect,distinctly female,but not when I wanted it,which was not much,just when they wanted me,that ,I found could be anytime but only in the bath house .Security was a big worry!They really wanted a lookout for both of them wanted to be with me at times. They eventually found one,he just wanted to watch occasionally as payment and would change places with one of them briefly. He always wanted to play with himself and cum over my tummy,and make me rub it all over. Never really understood him.
For 4 months,two/three times a week,sometimes during the night ,I would be woken,taken by the hand,to the bathroom by one of them. They had a rule that they would always use me together,for safety.I could tell by touch who was having me,and by now,we had progressed to me being fucked on my back,with an occsional foray of me on top.This I liked as they were both bigger than me and I found that I could control them,tart that I was!! For the statiscally inclined,one was 8"uncut,the other 9",cut.I had to measure tham for a bet.I was all of 4"when really aroused.
When they left ,I cried,and so did they,and times being what they were,we never met again although I did have some fairly steamy love letters.
To say that I felt abused/and damaged by this would be a gross lie,I loved every minute and had it not been for the rules and society would have found other boyfriends.I had two further romances,the last about 10 years ago ,but they are other stories.
I hope that this is of interest and would welcome your views,as frankly ,I have never talked to anyone about this..
To continue. I became a very good distance runner,finding out to my pleasure that the Greeks used to run naked.I wondered if they felt the terror and anticipation that I experied .I think that it improved my technique considerably. It was certainly very erotic,the thought of all those twinkling bottoms is a great turn on for me as a girl,what it did for a man ,well,I knew that too ! I wish I could do it again.
Now out of school ,I forgot (almost) the girly me,still effeminate,and prissy,I was not really interested in sex,which in retrospect ,must have made a few people angry.I just did not recognise the approaches made. I was a very naive person !! Even having a rub down following a run did not arouse me in that way until one day I fell ,injuring my thigh and shoulder.This on a ploughed field in Febuary,and it hurt. I needed a physio! Our team one was a prop forward,20 stone,hairy,and 6ft 3 in, not at all a girls person ,so I thought,at least not little old me. What a suprise I had coming !
The treatment was good,but during the course of itI,and Andy discovered that I had incredibly sensitive nipples,something that my previous lovers had ignored. Then they were not very big,but now they ,my breasts had a distinct swell to them,like a thirteen year old girls would be. They are bigger now.
Anyway, I was under a small towel,Andy just in brief shorts,and he flicked at my response and tweaked me.It caused me to react,and I tried to hide it,then I noticed HIS reaction !!
He was HUGE!! He said not to worry ,these things happened all the time. Then he locked the door. I stood up to go,and he came to me,took my waist and said "No" pulled me to him and gave me the best ,most passionate kiss that I had had for years.I had almost forgotten the effects they had on me. Dizzy,weak kneed,almost an orgasm,I reached up and put my arms around his neck and surrendered myself,allowing him to do as he wished. He was good,but when he moved against me ,I felt this very firm pressure on my abdomen. If any of you have felt the pressure of a man wanting you,then you will know what I mean,and also the emotion that comes with it. Raw phallic power,and I was his!! I wonder if it affects everyone like that?Its a very basic and raw emotion.
I had never really compared size with my other lovers,I knew that I was small,and they always felt huge,I shut my eyes when they used my lips,but did know that one was bigger,the one that I liked best,but this was something else!! He must have been 10inches,(he was ,I measuered it later!) Picking me up ,he laid me back on he couch,and started telling me nice things,like how he had always found me atractive,pretty,and had wanted to tell me ages ago. He said that he loved me and wanted me to be his boyfriend. Of course ,we were both terrified ,EVERYTHING then being illegal. I said that I was very flattered and that I liked him a lot,and ,Yes,I was his. I did know about being submissive to men,and he was certainly very forcefull ,he wanted me and was going to have me. I was happy with that. He then made love to me ,very gently at first,then we both got very carried away,my lips were bruised for days,my bottom was nicely on fire,and I had this ache,a nice one in my loins.My waist was bruised where he had hold of me. He took particular care oiling me as he had noticed my apprehension when I saw what he was going to use on me.The first time that he inserted it ,it hurt a lot,but using lots of oil ,he very slowly broke me in. I felt it and just knew that it would be okay ,after a bit,but I had had no one for about 2 years. Wonderfull ,feeling loved and owned,its an indescribable emotion, God,I WAS IN LOVE FOR THE FIRST TIME. Not once did it occur to me that it was wrong in any way at all. Being penetrated was uncomfortable at first,but once he was in me,there was a wonderful feeling of not being in control and of being used.
I have always found kissing friends easy and have often had to restrain myself ,on meeting people the urge seems natural to me,I am so girly that it hurts sometimes to repress feelings so much,but I learned a lot about kissing in those days,but rarely with a girl.I found that they generally,were not good at it . To continue, we had a very torrid love life,I became good friends with both Andy and his sister,who knew about us,having discovered us in a clinch one rainy Saturday. To both our suprise ,she thought nothing of it ,and told us to just behave as we felt when she was around. We did and I had the occasional cuddle with her,I think she was just curious,and a flirt.She did however ask Andy if she could have me for a night. This was fine but I had to explain that I was very submissive.This was fine with her and she enjoyed it so much that it happened a few times,always with permission. This was the first girl that had me.
As friends ,we went out a bit,not to parties,just pubs in those days,clubs were for the very posh and monied folk. One day Chrissie said that we had been invited to a party,one of her friends was giving it,Fancy Dress,and we WERE ALL going.She was a bit of a bully.I was to go as a Flapper,Andy as a pirate herself as Cleopatra.I was not sure what a flapper was,but she said not to worry ,all was in hand. I soon found out,frilly knickers ,a very short frock with sequins,black fishnets,suspeders,the lot,plus make up and a wig. They both had a wonderful time dressing me,and putting my make up on. This was just a rehersal as I was then taken down town to be flaunted around.Actually,this gave me tremendous confidence as I followed Chrissies lead,watched her movements,chatted to her friends,all of whom accepted me. This was in the days when one could be violently assualted by Homophobic,and I suspect,envious male apes.Several dress rehersals later,Chrissie declared that I was good enough to pass. The party was at big house,very formal with a very good jazz band,the evening was warm,the drinks flowing and I was on the arms of my most trusted and loved ,friends. We danced,I danced with both Chrissie (practicing the girls part) and Andy and several of his friends. I was wearing a tight pantie corslete which hid any unfortunate bulges,in fact my "bits" have always tucked away well ,as the original sockets have never closed up.Naked in the cold they all dissapear,which is very satisfactory. The dance progressed to the slower numbers and I was encouraged to dance with other boys,and I was beginning to be very aware of being held a bit tighter and being pulled into what felt like very firm members.In fact,this happened with every slow dance. I asked Chrissie if this was always the case with women too.She said yes,but most girls did not mention it,it was a secret girls kept. I said that I found it very exciting,and they both said that I should go and enjoy it to the full.
Having had a drink for courage,I nipped to the bathroom to prepare myself for any eventuality,just in case,not really expecting more than a grope .Going back to my friends ,I was stopped by a gorgeous boy,dressed as Superman,which showed rather a lot of his contures. We danced,he pressing himself to my tummy, I think ,believing that I was a girl. Leading me off the floor to a dark corner ,I thought I ought to say that it was a fancy dress party and I was not that kind of girl, but he appeared not to care or hear me. We went into a summer house,where he backed me on to the wall,and holding me there,put his hands up my skirt,and removed my panties with one hand.These were tight,deliberatly,and I had struggled to get them on so I was a bit stunned. Still holding me he forced his way between my legs,grabbed the backs of my thighs and lowered me on to his already exposed member. It felt huge, (and was,)just nuzzling my bottom,and I struggled a little,just enough for dignity,then (thank goodness for preparation) with about three thrusts,he was in me ,not to the hilt but jolly near. It hurt at first like hell and I squealed,this made him push the rest in, then began a slow pounding. I hung onto his neck ,and tried to relax !!!!Pah,anyone who says lie back and think of England has never been on the end of one of them!!Icould not move,was impaled on what felt like an elephant,who show no sign of slowing down at all. I was to be crude ,being fucked senseless. After some 15 minutes of this,he came with much thrusting and more grasping of my waist,and kissed me very firmly,me thinking "THE SWINE HAS BRUISED ME"Ungrateful slut that I was. He lifted me off the still rigid member,and lowered me to the floor,said thank you and left. It was then that I noticed Andy and Chrissie1 They had watched it all,and as I stood there ,oozing cum,looking for my knickers,told me that they had set it up,and now it was Andys turn!!!! I said no f......way in my best lady manner,but they pleaded with me,Andy had always had a yen to be second, and with their combined kissing and touch,I agreed,but it had to be gentle on my terms.
I lay on the floor ,knickerless,legs apart while Andy got ready.He entered me so gently,(I was probably a bit stretched ,no a lot)straight to the hilt and just held me saying sorry and how much he loved me. Chrissie stood over us ,keeping watch,the bonus for me was that I could see up her skirt,AND noticed that she had no knickers on too!! Unfortunatly for fortunatly depending on your point of view she saw me looking and squatted down on my face,and I k,new that she had been fucked very, very recently,which is why she had no knickers on. The usual smell of Facial Wipes was there but overlain with male/female sexual smells,a little like having a cold jelly fish rubbed on your face.She laughed and wiggled her bottom on me.After a very satisfactory fuck,Andy cleaned me up,Chrissie gave me her knicks to wear,we went back via the ladies,where Chrissie repaired my make up. I looked exactly how I felt ,a real slut. I should have felt bad ,but I did not. Having semen dripping down my legs,and wet knicks should have just been uncomfortable,but it was a very naughty feeling.It was not all fun trying to be a Fastiidous Giirl by any means.
We stayed friends for 18 months or so,Chrissie got married,I cried at her Wedding,embarrasing everyone,except her Mother,who lent me a hankie .Andy went to Hong Kong and we lost touch for some years. My career took precedence,that sport kept my hormones in check but it was not easy. I was coerced into joining a theatre group,as a stage hand,but within a month was a high kicking chorus girl as we were very short of girls,just 4 of them. I kept very quiete about my previous experience,as I was under close scrutiny,being on stage in sexy clothes,in a place where there were few English women. I would been very much in demand,indeed,I got some very flattering reviews,and personal letters from some suprising sources. I did go out with one person ,and even weny on holiday,dressed,but I was too much in the limelight to be open. The girls in the group treated me as one of them,I socialised with their families ,probably to maintain my respectability and distance myself from the lusting hordes.After a self imposed absence from Sophie of some 20 years,apart from brief forays into knickers,but otherwise totally straight living,I met Andy again. He was now married as was I ,He wanted to meet again,so we did. The urge to kiss him was so strong that I did,suprisng myself and him,but he did respond,and we were private. We talked of the old times an he proposed that we do it again. I said that I had not dressed for years,he said that I was still his Sophie and all sorts of sweet things,and convinced me,so we set a date.I would be Sophie from the start.
We arranged to meet at my cottage,abeautifull day,sunny and warm. I bathed,and perfumed myself,Chanel No5,and put my pink frilly knickers and bra on,with a basque,with suspeders. It was warm but I thought very sheer stockings would be comfy.Anyway,they would feel nice.White heels,open toed,and a floaty summer frock finished me off,plus lippy etc of course. I looked and felt GOOD!
At the appointed time ,I was twitching around the garden with that butterfly tummy feeling,and saw his car coming,a very distinctive green,whhich I did not like at all. When he got out I nearly swooned,if thats the word.It was Andy of old,a little distinguised looking,a comfy looking paunch,and tanned.I threw myself at him and we kissed ,for an age.I did live in a remote place,so there was no fear of beibg seen. He picked me up,and we went indoors,carried over my own doorstep. Kissing me senseless again,I eventually disentangled myself to make tea,having been made very aware, of his pressing need for me,I wanted this to last and not to be a wham bam thing ,which I knew he,and most men,liked.I wanted to play the lady and tease him a little before submitting to him. Was this the bitch in me?
So,I made tea and got biscuits,made difficult by Andy ,insisting on holding me from behind ,kissing my neck etc. I could have been had on the kitchen table but fought the urge.We went to the sitting room,where I arranged myself oposite him,just displaying enough leg,with a hint of stocking top to maintain the errection that I could see,but pretended not to notice. We chatted about old times,Chrissie,now a doting Grandmother,who if she heard the mere mention of body fluids,would reach for bucket of water. "Superman" was now a Doctor of Divinity,and butter would not melt in his mouth We were the survivors so we were going to have to make th best of it.
We talked,had biscuits,and i stood to top up the tea cups,when he seized me ,placing both hands up my skirt,and very expertly whipping my pink lacey knickers down. Holding my skirt up,Andy then took all of me in his mouth,I could feel his rouh beard on my freshly shaven mound. He then began almost to eat me !A very intense feeling,especially as he was now holding my bottom in both hands ,pulling me to him. He had all of me in his mouth and was really giving me a good chewing.
Hobbled,with my knickers ,all I could do was stand there with my hands on his shoulders,trembling before this intrusion. It made me feel a little unlady likeand I woobled on my heels
After an age,he released me ,and standing up ,kissed me hard,picked me up,threw me over his shoulder,fireman style,smacked my bottom and proceded up stairs.If you have never been carried by a very strong man,try it,just for the sheer sensuousness of it.Spanking me with his free hand,he carted me up stairs to the bedroom,depositing me on the bed where I lay ,smarting a bit. This was new to me! I had never been spanked and I liked it! Undressing,I saw that he was bigger than I remembered,but probably was not,just my wishful thinking. He was as hairy as ever ,though,and still fairly well built,even though he had a tummy.This ,I did not mind,in fact found it rather attractive. He climbed on the bed,forced his knees between my legs,and holding my bottom,lifted me up into a suitable position. Again,I had prepared before hand,(this,girls ,is a must if you are to really enjoy yourselves,) and with 4 thrusts ,he was in me,not totally comfortable for me,but it got better!He was ok!!
I felt and heard, his testicles bouncing on my bottom,and started to respond,it soon became a blur of sensations. He turned me over,made me kneel, fucked me then made me sit on him and bounce up and dow until he flipped me on m back and putting my feet over his shoulders,drove into me again. Despite what people say,I felt him climax in me,it was warm and with a swelling feeling inside of me.Gallons of it ,I thought.
Andy rolled onto his back ,holding me in place,where I slowly disengaged,and lay in his arms and toyed with his still ,suprisingly firm and sticky ,penis. We lay like this for sometime,just gently kissing,and caressing each other, then he told me to stand and place my hands on the dressing table, I was still wearing strappy heels,suspenders and a bra,coming up behind me ,he entered me again,easily this time,and I was at the right height,lifting me up with the force of it,and very firmly grasped my waist,and comenced to fuck me again. This was a bit new as normally I gave myself on my back so I just enjoyed the new sesation,pushing back when required. There was another explosion of breath,and heavy thrusting,as he came again,I swear that I felt this again inside.After a bit ,we disengaged,and he went to the shower ,where I knelt on the floor,waiting for him.When he came out,I feeling very slutty,took him in my mouth and sucked him dry,almost choking.
Following my shower,I put clean undies and a frock on and we walked around the garden ,hand in hand,in the sun Heavily ino a kiss,we failed to notice a walker,who asked for directions. Without really thinking ,I gave them,he did not bat an eyelid,but was clearly interested in what he saw.When I thought about it,I was sillouteted ,the sun behind me ,aroused,with a filmy frock on and very skimpy undies,nearly killed him ,I think!!Ihave rarely seen a persons jaw drop,I thought it was just an expression. It was very flattering for me,Andy laughed.
Anyhow,reunited,we walked through the fields to a pub,not my local,and straight into our walking friend and his group.We had a very convivial evening,me being kissed by everyone when we left,and being had again ,very quickly,by Andy on the way home.Gosh,I was getting a bit bruised by now,and was rather glad that Andy could not stay the night!!
Some months later,pottering about in my undies,just doing household chores,I heard a knock on the window.I looked out on to a footpath,popular with walkers,and lo and behold ,it was our walker of before,grinning in at me. He indicated that he wanted to speak and went to the door. I slipped a negligee on and opened it. He explained that his group had realised what I was,and thought it great. My God ,I thought he is going to bring them all here to blackmail me ! He then said that he was picking up his friend who was walking the other way across the moor,and could wait inside the house. It was pelting down ,so I said yes and offered coffee. He said "Is that all"leeriing at my legs.Well ,I had never indulged in casual sex,it was raining ,he did kiss me nicely,and I was feeling a bit sexy,so I said "What else would you like"He said "You"
I did the offended female bit,thinking that this could be fun,and sat down, and he suddenly stripped his shorts off,exposing a truly magnificant cock,really big.I almost passed out,it certainly made me press my legs together,and I could not help gasping. He crossed to me,pushing me back on to my back,took hold of the crutch of my knickers ad pulled.They came apart ,leaving a lacey bit around my waist. They were cheap ones.,but pretty and comfy,so I was a bit miffed.Forcening my legs apart,he tried to enter me. This was rape,and not a lot I could do about it.He was about 35,14stone ,very fit ,it seemed and strong,also some 20 years my junior. Time to lie back and think of England,or enjoy it,I tthought. I said "If you intend to fuck me please let me prepare myself,it will be better for both of us"and going to the kitchen,I used a handfull of best butter,inserted as far as I could. Wiping myself,I went back to find him now totally naked! Wow!!!Rape or not ,this was going to be fun. He told me to bend me over the back of the armchair,and oh so slowly inserted the monster.After an age ,and feeling really streched ,I felt his balls touch my bottom,and he grasped my hips to begin the fucking of a life time,like nothing I had felt before. I just slumped pushing my bottom up ,let him have his way.He only lasted about 10 minutes before reaching a gasping climax,driving hinself deep as he came,and hurting me .Climbing off me ,he said thank you and sorry,but he had planned this for sometime and could his friend have me as well. Suddenlly,I was back in control. Idly,reaching for him ,I asked"Why"and he stumbled through all sorts of reasons,a bit embarrassed.He was also getting hard with my manipulation,very near to coming ,so I stopped. He begged me to carry on. TRAPPED.you male fool !! You belong to ME.
When his friend came,thats how he found us,and I made him ask if he could "please ,PLEASE,Sophie,let me fuck you,because my friend has,"I had not stopped teasing his friend who still had not come ,due to a cunning finger nail stopping him. I told him to undress slowly for me which he did,go and wash himself,and report back. He was as big as his friend,but long and thin,like a snake,thobbing with lust.I think Indian,certainly an all over lovely tan,but did not care very much,I was cock mad,and trying to be casual about it. I then lay back and allowed him into me,his friend watching ,while I played with him still. He did all the work,me just saying faster/slower etc worked well,I had always been submissive till now. They were both covered with sweat. When he came ,I did also and I allowed his friend to as well,collecting it all in my hand and rubbed it all on my tummy. Now I understood why my childhood watcher did it. Warm ,fresh cum sticky to the touch is very sensual when handled.I felt great,the great Whore. Staying half naked ,dripping cum I made them tea and sandwiches,and,as a special treat for me I sucked them both off standing together. Another first fo me,and I think them.They had never both had their cocks together before and comented on the feel. I said that I had never had two cocks together before so I showed them what I wanted by sitting on one and guiding the other in on top.That was fun in itself ,handling two rampant youths They went at me like dogs, coming both in fairly quick time ,which I put down to me ,showering my thighs with cum .which I made them wipe off this time .They then departed,showering me with thanks and kisses,promising,jokily.to really rape me next time! Who fucked who,I thought!
Well they did return but thats for another day.
A happy ending to something that could have turned very nasty.I like to think that they learned from