going out for first time

    • 4 posts
    June 4, 2013 12:09 AM BST
    ok, so i'm looking for some advice/ encouragement. in a few weeks time i'll again have the house to myself and of course i will be dressing. this time i'd like to take it further and i'm 98% ready to venture out in public. nothing too full on just maybe visit a few public places, possibly outwith my own area, where i will definitely be seen. the only thing holding me back is being seen as an obvious guy in makeup and girly clothes, what i'd really like is to be, for the most part at least, taken for a woman.
    so, for those of you who have seen my photos, would you say i could go out in public without drawing too much negative attention, and do you have any words of advice on how to make myself more convincing?
    • 6 posts
    June 4, 2013 8:07 AM BST
    You look amazing go for it . X
    • 401 posts
    June 5, 2013 10:48 AM BST
    well from looking at your pics you look fab hunnie and ready to hit the town

    and for a first time outing if you can afford it and make it there is sparkle its great for the first time as there will be loads of us girls there first timers and season vets lol but remeber if you just want to go for a walk around near where you live dress girly but casual not over the top glam you will pass more as a girl if you are not glammed up with thigh boots and a whip lol

    so go for it i wish you all the best ya sexy minx xxxxx
    • 4 posts
    June 5, 2013 9:41 PM BST
    well thanks for the votes of confidence so far, i'm pretty sure i will go for it in some way. yeah, amymichelle, i was kinda thinking to go sort of low key sexy rather than all-out hooker style. much as i'd like to take a walk down the high street in a leather mini and thigh boots i'm definitely not ready for the response to that yet!
    • 43 posts
    June 7, 2013 8:20 PM BST
    You will absolutely not be taken as anything other than a beautiful sexy girl. You look stunning; I wish I looked as good as you. The only thing to avoid I would think is talking to anyone, as I assume your voice is male like mine and most of us, and of course stay away from large groups of rowdy men: whether they suss you or not (they won't) it would still be a risk, so don't be tempted. If you can, try to go out with someone but if not then just stay as you say low-key and don't attract unwelcome attention ie don't get drunk! At the last, if your nerve goes just jump in a taxi and get yourself home. But I think you'll have a great time, and you can bet some male (and maybe some female) eyes will be watching you, in lust and maybe envy.

    Let us know how you get on.

    Best of luck!
    Stacey-Lynn
    xxx
    • 10 posts
    June 8, 2013 11:11 AM BST
    You look great so no worries there. I'm assuming you want to blend in with your surroundings and don't want to draw attention to yourself, if thats the case dress appropriately for your age and the situation. Take a look at what other girls are wearing and pick an outfit and do your makeup accordingly. This may be lower key than you have in mind but its a tradeoff between looking ordinary or getting noticed.
    You are better going to public areas which are busy rather than skulking around backstreets, you will pass by unnoticed in busy areas as everyone is pre-occupied with whatever they are doing. Its areas with few people around that you are more likely to be noticed - I know it sounds nonsensical but its true.

    Have a purpose and a plan, don't wander around aimlessly or furtively - nothing will get you noticed more than acting suspiciously regardless of what you are wearing. If you are going shopping then take a list of inexpensive items to buy and go shopping for them. If you want to do cultural there are plenty of country houses, churches, museums or galleries to visit. Take a glossy mag to read in case you stop for coffee or a rest (or for reading on the bus).

    Enjoy yourself and don't forget to smile.

    Good Luck!
    • 105 posts
    June 8, 2013 12:29 PM BST
    You look great! And I guess the message is 'less is more'! My first time out I liked to sit in coffee shops, sitting down felt safer as a tall bird, made me more anonymous (if thats possible for me LOL). And I took something to read, another way to shut out the world and calm your nerves. I took a notebook too and wrote a real-time blog to kinda share the feelings of a first-timer. Bookshops are good too, you can browse, take your time and get used to being out.

    Enjoy! HOW EXCITING!!!!!! xxxxxxx

    This post was edited by Julie Hawkwood at June 8, 2013 12:30 PM BST
    • 866 posts
    June 8, 2013 2:45 PM BST
    The best advice I can give you is to dress "age appropriate"; have a look at the way women of your age dress when they are out and about. That way when you do go out you will blend in more easily. It may mean adding different items to your wardrobe - like flats - if you go out in the daytime. The other advice - enjoy it even though you will be scared; and Julie is right - less is more. Good luck. Pauline xxx
    • 4 posts
    June 8, 2013 3:48 PM BST
    thanks for all the advice and encouragement so far. i'm still not sure where i'll go first time out, and i don't even know if it'll be day or night, it'll depend on how the opportunity presents itself i suppose. i'll probably try to avoid close face to face contact first time out i would think, since i'm not sure how that would work out. my main worry really was that every single person who set eyes on me would know right away and make some kind of comment but maybe that wouldn't be the case. i suppose you can always get a bit of that no matter what. thanks again. xx
    • 105 posts
    June 8, 2013 4:01 PM BST
    Maria, we've talked a lot about this on this site and my understanding of the collected wisdom is:

    - No-one gives a shit. People live in their own bubbles and have their own shit to deal with. They don't need to worry about a stranger in different clothes.

    -There's always an arsehole. Whether you are too fat, too thin, too black, too white, disabled, have long hair, have green hair, there is always an arsehole who might comment. BUT that's part of life and they are VERY rare.

    I think the saddest thing I've found lately is the opposite to people commenting. I DON'T pass at all and I am quite Amazonian and I think often, ok VERY often LOL, I scare/frighten peopleThat's a shame!

    xxxxx
    This post was edited by Julie Hawkwood at June 8, 2013 4:01 PM BST
    • 43 posts
    June 8, 2013 8:22 PM BST
    Just an idea I had if you're really nervous. Try going to the movies. After all, these days you can buy your ticket and get seated without even having to talk to anyone, and once you're in its an hour or two of being in the gloom so few if anyone is going to notice you, and if they do they'll just blame it on the light. Meanwhile you can relax and enjoy the movie.
    • 4 posts
    August 4, 2013 4:41 AM BST
    well, bit the bullet and went out in public last night and tonight. nothing special, just drove to a couple of places, took a couple of walks around town and stuff. anyway, so far i haven't had one negative comment, or even as much as one dodgy look. i've come to the conclusion there's three possibilities. one is that the vast majority of people just don't pay any attention to anyone and wouldn't notice how you looked. second is that maybe every person who looks at me knows right off that i'm a trannie but doesn't feel they have to let me know it (respect maybe, but i doubt it) and third is the possibility that maybe (and this is my real hope, although i'm not convincing myself) the majority just take me for a woman and see no reason to think otherwise. anyway, i'm so happy within myself that i've taken these first steps although i do worry that i'll want to become maria full time, which isn't an option right now.
    This post was edited by maria mcghee at August 4, 2013 4:42 AM BST
    • 5 posts
    August 5, 2013 9:54 PM BST
    Hi Maria, I finally did it a couple of months ago, after seeing an event on here.I got up the courage and mentioned it to my girlfriend. I have never been out of the house dressed up and she dared me to do it. Of course, I didn't need much persuasion and we were soon deciding on my outfit. We opted for a cute little orange dress with leggings (nothing too tarty for my 1st time!).
    As the evening approached I started to get to get nervous but just thought "it's now or never" so started getting ready in plenty of time.
    A long shower and all over shave to make me nice and girly. Cute underwear on, including my new push up wonderbra, shortie thong and corset, then the make up. My girlfriend painted my finger nails (toes still done from a couple of nights previous) and helped tie my hair up. On with the heels, a quick drink and smoke, then time to sprint down the drive without the neighbours spotting me...it was only 6.30pm.
    The drive there was eventless but sooooo exciting...no one even glanced. I would have appreciated a wolf whistle or wink at least but no-one suspected a thing. Confidence building it was time to park..i was hoping to get right outside Scarlet's ( the great place run by Sarah and Jennifer) but no, 2 streets away. I started to panic and considered going home but again my gf convinced me I would be ok so I parked up in a busy Blackpool street in broad daylight, got out of the car and clicked my heels all the way to the initial meeting point. Wow...here i was, walking the streets dressed as a girl. Again, no comments or looks that I know of but I did have my head down, especially as a couple with a little girl came towards me crossing the road! Haven't had a full night out again yet but will be doing soon and hope you do too. Life's too short !! x
    • 1 posts
    October 14, 2013 4:44 PM BST
    You've no worries Maria you look fab. x
    • 31 posts
    November 19, 2013 8:44 AM GMT
    Maria, I wish I had your looks and figure. I went out for the first time last year and was scared stiff, didn't look at anyone, didn't go in shops and wanted to get back to the car. I went out again not long after and still avoided situations where I had to walk past people, I also made the emistake of wearing heels which gave me a blister. After that I went to Southport and had a great day, went in a shop and bought petrol. Then there was no stopping me. Last week I went back to Southport and did all sorts of stuff including park and ride, using the ladies, Debemhams, Boots, etc. The more you get out the easier it is. I gave myself goals to achieve like going in Asda and buying some knickers for example. Last time I dressed casual in jeans and boots and my winter coat. I don't consider myself passable but as other girls have said people are in their own little world and although some do catch your eye and give you the 'look'. I came out of Morrisons and 2 lads saw me and one of them said, 'was that a tranny?' to his mate. They came back out for a second look which was quite flattering. :-D In the shops I spoke to several assistants in my own voice just a little softer and all was fine. Be confident, look up and give people a smile if they look at you and you'll be fine. x