2nd part of my Sons Atricle about his Dad Stephpvc .
The bits I left out…

I think my dads timing was really important. My brother and I were both in our late teens and had reached the stage in our lives when we were deciding where we were going and what career path to take. I think if we had been younger (though I’m sure some would say even teens is still pretty young!) we might not have understood the significance and reasons behind it in the way that we have. It wasn’t forced on us as something we had to accept and live with on a regular basis, as we were (and still are) focused on our own goals and aspirations rather than every one else’s. Yes, family is family, and that’s exactly why it’s important to accept my dad’s lifestyle choices as a part of who he is as a person, and not make a deal of it. Everyone needs support and all anyone wants is to be accepted in life for who they are.

Some people ‘get it’ and some people don’t. I know my brother understands what’s involved with being a TV, but I don’t think he knows why my dad slips the heels and makeup on every known again. Some people would say it was a phase, a mid-life crisis or a cry for attention. Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t – though I know that my dad does it for himself and know one else. He doesn’t want to impress anyone or show off, it’s just his way of expressing his inner self – the side that really represents who he is as a person.

In contemporary society dressing is well known from country to country and is accepted now more than it has ever been, yet it is still a taboo subject. I know this as there are only a handful of my family that know about Steph, as they either would not understand it or just wouldn’t know how to deal with it. It takes a certain sort of person to make that step into society, to wear their heart on their sleeve (and their bracelets) and feel comfortable in themselves dressed and to do it for themselves above all else. From what I know my brother and I were the first to be told about Steph. I guess it’s because we are his son’s and it’s much easier for us to accept a change like this as we are of a generation that is exposed to so much in life at an early age. It’s not a huge deal, to some people it would be, but not for us. I’ve always believed that everything is as complicated or as difficult as you want to make it, and you do have a choice in that.

My grandparents would find it very tricky to understand and accept it, as they have very ‘traditional’ ideals and an outlook in life that is set in stone, rather than being open to new things. What’s interesting is my dad’s auntie knows all about Steph, and is as comfortable as anything about it yet she grew up in the same house as my Grandma! Though I’m not sure whether she has been treated to a glammed up night on the town with Steph yet as I have !

My brother and I have never shouted about my dad’s new lifestyle, as we understand that it’s a personal choice and something which isn’t necessarily our place. We’ve both told our girlfriends and they are fine with it, though we have never really gone any further than that. I’ve always seen it as a ‘need to know’ thing – if they need to know, I’ll tell them and if not, its not worth the hastle and heartache. It sounds sad to put it like that, but we all now how opinionated and judgemental everyone can be, and we all like to think we know our family. I’ve never mentioned Steph to my Mum or my stepbrother, as they’ve never needed to know. They haven’t come into contact with my dad for years now (my parents split when I was six) so it just wouldn’t be worth it. My dad has mentioned it to family he feels comfortable to talk about it to, and that’s where the line has been drawn. Our family has always been quite distant, so I guess its fortunate that my dad can keep Steph discreet should he need to, without family knocking on the door or rallying through his wardrobe!

Getting to know my dad as Steph has helped me see the world a lot differently to what I would have, as it’s allowed me to keep an open mind and to understand and respect people for who they are and how they wish to live. Everyone is different and everyone is unique, no matter how much people try and categorise and judge each other - we should all respect each other for who we are and give the freedom, time and effort to who we want to be in life.

thanks for a great story . how cool and loving made me cry

Thanks for sharing, wishing you the best, love Jady xxx

Some very sensible and considerate attitudes here,something that i`ve not personally been favoured with amongst my close family.

A very well written piece and i can understand how they feel as i told my girls when they were teenagers and they are just so cool about it all and always have been . Its good to see it from the other side thou .

what mature and well adjusted children!! amazing! XXX

Wow Steph your amazing. : )
Hugs
xx Jay xx

Good piece of Writing, and what understanding son.s you have steph.

Thanks Girls xx

Annie here my daughter 14 was told about chloe though not her bio dad my lizzy said if it makes him happy no worries before rushing into chloes wardrob and trying stuff on she was told last week after a comming here to vist and left with two nighties a skirt and some of chloes makeup shes 14 sounds like u sons are understanding and supportive which is fab xxx

lovely story your a lucky girl.i wish i had a little bit of that understanding from my wife,good luck girls xx