January 30, 2015 4:13 PM GMT
My observation is that many of the things that Janet fantasizes about are actually here - out there in the real world.
1. Clothes - Transgendered people can buy clothes of the opposite gender, and if you are M to F it's not that difficult to find clothes that fit you from size 6 to size 30. Sometimes shoes in larger sizes are an issue, but by and large most Tgirls can buy their clothes in the same places that real women do. We really don't need signs in the window saying trans friendly, and FYI most UK retailers of women's fashion have policies that mean we are treated the same way as RGs when shopping.
2. Safe places to visit. If you want a dressing service - these are available as well, not just in the UK but across Europe and North America.
3. Transgendered support groups. As well as national groups like the Beaumont Society there are local groups like Manchester Concord in many places in the UK.
4. TG websites. As well as this site and TV chix there are ones like jasmine julie james and also the sex sites (like Birch Place and Fab Swingers) for those who want to meet people. And sites like this and others provide a forum where you can safely say things, come out and talk with other people who have been on your type of journey before.
5. Safe places to go. It's not just Manchester's Gay Village or Brighton in the UK, many places like Leeds and Birmingham have areas where it's relatively safe to go out dressed.
6. I am not sure where you got your numbers from on Transgendered suicides; there is no statistical correlation between how many Tgirls go shopping and how many commit suicide.
Yes the suicide rate in the transgendered community is much higher than the average suicide rate for society in general, but that is due to many other factors than being able to go shopping - things like being able to retain your job when you transition and losing your family and friends are much more traumatic.
Yes the UK and other countries are not paradises when you are trans gendered, but they are relatively tolerant towards us. Many people have fought hard for some of the rights that you and the rest of us enjoy. Yes of course there are transphobic and homophobic people - that's why the LGBT community has memorial days and services, so we can remember those who were killed for being gay or transgendered.
Going out and about as a transgendered person is never easy. I always assume that I will be read and that I could get nasty comments. I rarely do - even though I am 5'10" and dress size 22 - maybe its because whether I am shopping in my local Asda, sitting on the tram or shopping in Manchester I try to smile and enjoy being out as me?
It's up to you to put your finger in the plum pie of life and pull out a plum. Only you can lead your life and make the steps you want to. Since 2000 its been so much easier to find out more about being TG than it was in the past.
Take the opportunities that are there instead of wanting to be in some kind of TG ghetto - thats my advice.
Pauline xxxx
This post was edited by Pauline Smith at January 30, 2015 4:47 PM GMT