My Affliction...or my Addiction?

• Posted by Candy Cane September 1, 2016 #spanking  #pain  #  #chastise  #self pain  1,631 views
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  When I was young and needed to be spanked, My father was always so drunkenly tanked!
  
  The pain from his spanking hurt so bad, my father was always unreasonably mad!
  
  He'd tell me he loved me and was for my own good, it was unbearable because I felt misunderstood.
  
  When my siblings were next in line, I'd tell my father the spankings were all mine.
  
  He'd call me an idiot for taking their swats, but my siblings knew someone loved them a lot.
  
  I did that many times because they deserved nothing, his drunken anger was so disgusting.
  
  Take your anger out on a man I'd say to myself, I wish he could see his drunkin self?
  
  It was my duty to take the beatings, now I have to attend many meetings.
  
  I've been doing something strange to others, I inflict pain on myself imagining it was my little brothers.
  
  With a leather belt I smack my back and ass, Sometimes I feel I have no class.
  
  Yes it stings and burns but so hypnotic, it is so fulfilling and feels so erotic?
  
  I thought that I was born with this affliction, now I know it's my own sick addiction?
  
  Candy XOXO